Every teacher has funny stories to share…
We could probably each contribute a chapter’s worth of content.
Because kids are that silly and ridiculous! And you never know on any given day what kind of crazy will go down in your classroom!
To get things started on this section, I thought I’d share a few gems from my days teaching kindergarten.
On the first day of school, I had my students draw a self-portrait. I thought it would be fun to look back at the end of the year and see how much their handwriting and picture drawing skills had changed.
Great plan, or so I thought…
Me: “Hey buddy, come show me your picture!”
D: “Here it is!” (He was beaming with pride.)
Me: (Surprise eyes) “Wow buddy…tell me about your picture that you drew.”
D: “This is me. And this is my penis.”
Me: (Nice to meet you? Stifling laughter.) “Thank you for sharing that with me. Now go put your picture in your cubby so you can take it home and show Mommy and Daddy.”
*It was literally a picture of a head, torso, arms, no legs, and a giant weiner. Hilarious!
One year during writing time, one of my little friends raised her hand to signal she was done with her journal entry. I told her to please come to my desk and share her work with me.
M: “Look what I wrote Miss Merryman!”
Me: (Surprise eyes) “Wow, can you read it to me?”
M: “My mom has big boobs.”
Me: (Big gulp) “Sweetie, I’m so glad you decided to write about your Mommy. But next time let’s not write about how she has big boobs.”
M: (Bawling) “But she DOES! She does have big boobs!”
*Her picture was a stick figure with 2 huge circles on the chest. I had met the mom before and her picture was definitely accurate.
One morning I was doing a math lesson on capacity…
Me: “Capacity measures how much something can hold. A suburban can hold more people than a smaller car. It has a greater capacity.
J: “Mrs. Johnson? You know Octomom? She had 8 babies.”
Me: “How do you know about Octomom?”
J: “My mom dressed up as Octomom for Halloween.”